Five of the Worst First Pitches in Recent Memory

Posted: July 6, 2011 by mceagle611 in Sports
Tags: , , , , , , ,

This afternoon as I fixated my self next to the computer to write my All-Star Weekend Guide I came across President Obama’s blooping opening pitch in St.Louis from last year. I snickered, as any fan who enjoys a good laugh would do, then it became clear to me that Sports Fans need a desperate laugh right now because it is quite a depressing time in Sports. Ever since the first ever ceremonial opening pitch was tossed by William Howard Taft in 1910, each heave thrown – signifying the start of the game – has been reviewed and criticized…especially if they end up in the dirt, in the net behind home plate, or – in Joan Steinbrenner’s case – a couple of feet from where they stand. So, I present to you the five worst opening pitches in recent memory and I promise you are going to laugh your ass off. Enjoy.

5 – Dirk Nowitzki – Dallas Maverick Forward – Dirk with the beautiful hanging wind-up and everything. If Michael Young could not jump so high then it would end up way in the back of the net behind home plate. What I love about this is that after the throw he thinks it was pretty decent so he flashes his muscle. To quote 1989 American movie – it is in english, maybe that’s why he didn’t understand – Major League with Charlie “Winning” Sheen, “JUUUUSSSSSTTTTT a bit outside.”

4 – Shawn Johnson – U.S. Gymnast – I saw this coming from the second I saw it on Sportscenter last year, thus proving gymnasts do not belong only belong in the free-dance diamond…..not on the baseball diamond. (skip to 00:25 on the video)

3 – John Wall – Washington Wizard Point Guard – COME ON JOHN! I expected it from Shawn Johnson, but from you?! Usually when you are that athletic you would have some idea of how to throw a baseball, I think this is a bit ridiculous. The Washington point guard loves to play a two-man game with JaVale McGee against the most elite players in the NBA; yet Wall cannot figure out how to get a baseball to home plate when it does not matter…geez!

2 – Mark Mallory – Mayor of Cincinnati – Woah! Where did that one go? The second Mallory let go of the ball I lost it, and then it hit me that it was 40 feet left! After the disgraceful throw, the umpire threw him out; too funny. He’s not even a player in the Reds game and he got ejected; even though it was a joke…ouch!

1 – Joan Steinbrenner – Wife of ex-Yankee owner George Steinbrenner – HAH! The one-handed push throw into the people not know that throwing a baseball is much easier than they make it seem? This ended up maybe 3 feet from her feet, I mean I think I threw the ball 10 feet when I was 3-years-old. In the words of ex-Minnesota Viking wide receiver Chris Carter, Come on man!!


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